Read Hollow by Caroline Peckham Chapter 20 –
Fae may have healed faster than humans ever could, but this might have been one of the worst injuries I’d ever secured in all my six hundred and fifty-two years. I had never felt this incapable and the more I pushed through the pain, the dizzier I became.
Climbing the stairs had been the first task and doing so had threatened to see me back on my knees.
I’d managed to run a hot bath into the pale blue clawfoot tub and gritted my teeth through the agony as I stripped out of my clothes, but I hadn’t yet made it in. Someone with the Art of water manipulation must have created the system here to pump water around this castle. It was something only the largest of the Fae households were privy to in Rivenspire – outside of those who possessed the Art themselves. I had been well-used to these luxuries in my old life, but the outcast existence held far less delights.
My fingers knotted around the side of the tub, the pain like wildfire in my flesh as I tried once again to enter the bath without passing out. I made it into the water but a roar of pure torment escaped me as it washed over my wounds. My eyelids drooped, too heavy to keep open against the cloying grip of darkness that was draped in my own agony.
Between the chaos of waking pain and unconscious nothingness, I found the past. The smiling faces of my family and the soft lull of my mother’s laugh. I felt her fingers on my cheek, her kiss against my brow.
“Hendrix,” she whispered. “You cannot brave the world alone.”
“You’re not dead, are you?” Ferris’s voice called me back to the land of the living and I cracked my eyes open. The water had turned red with my blood, tainted with a murky swirl of dirt too.
“Not yet,” I grunted, looking to the washcloth I’d left by the basin with a huff of frustration.
“It’s just, there was an almighty scream and then you went all quiet.”
“I didn’t scream,” I grunted.
“What was it then? A shriek?”
“I did not shriek, you insolent creature,” I griped, then groaned as my muscles tensed and jarred my injuries.
“Great. Well, fuck you. And good luck with the bath.” Her footsteps started padding away and I chewed my tongue, trying to fight back the word that was already forcing its way past my lips.
“Wait.”
Silence. But no more footsteps.
“Human,” I growled.
Nothing.
“Ferris,” I tried, my tone softening the slightest amount.
“Hendrix?” she questioned dryly.
“I have left my washcloth by the basin. Be a lamb and-”
“Mehh,” she baaed like a lamb, then her footsteps thumped away again.
I released a stream of curses, then gripped the sides of the bath, hauling myself to my feet with pain flaring across my chest. But all went black again and I crashed back down into the tub, sending water flying across the floor. I hit my head for good measure and dizziness settled over me thickly, making it hard to remain alert.
The door opened and light illuminated the hazy silhouette of Ferris as she entered the bathing chamber, the silvery cloud of her hair making her appear as some ethereal being. All I could do was stare, lost to a muted daze where she seemed to be the only thing in existence besides me. Those violet eyes held me hostage, choking away my ability to speak, but I managed to grumble an incoherent insult as she passed me by, retrieved the washcloth and tossed it at me. It slapped against my face and I peeled it off slowly, offering her a cold glare as my vision sharpened on her. The hardness in her gaze wasn’t going to serve me any good. I felt helplessly weak in front of her and I despised the fact.
Her gaze dipped to my wounds as I propped myself up in the bath and dabbed the long slice beneath my collar bone, tensing from the contact.
“This is all wrong.” Ferris shook her head at me. “You’re going to get an infection washing yourself with that filthy water.”
“Well, what do you suggest I do instead, lightwing? Hail down a healer?”
She strode forward and snatched the washcloth from me, rinsing it in the basin and wetting it with clean water. She returned, hesitating for a second and then kneeling beside the bath and dabbing lightly at my wounds. I stared at her face, rendered silent by the sudden contact, the closeness of her somehow making the pain more bearable. Her eyes never left my wounds as she worked, washing then rinsing and repeating, and my gaze never wavered from her in kind.
Her fingers grazed the uninjured skin beneath my right pec and a low growl rose in my throat, the sound both a warning and an invitation. She made no comment on it as her fingers continued to roam across my body, cleansing the shallower cuts. A fire started up in my skin that had everything to do with the way she touched me and there was no denying how enraptured I was by her.
“Who waits for you back home?” I asked, wondering if some forlorn human man was awaiting her return.
“Family,” she muttered, not meeting my gaze.
“Children?”
“No.”
“A husband?” I looked to the finger she might wear a ring on but it was empty.
“No.”
“Betrothed then? I hear your kind wed young and breed early.”
She slapped the wet cloth onto the slash across my ribs and I snarled in pain.
“Watch it,” I warned.
Her eyes flew up to meet mine. “Watch your mouth and I’ll watch my hand.”
“It was a simple statement.”
“No, it was rude.” She pressed harder on my wound and I grabbed her arm, yanking her close so that her free hand slapped down on my stomach to stop herself from falling right into the tub with me. “If you want my help, then you’d better start speaking to me with respect,” she hissed, unperturbed, though her pupils were wide as she stared at me, her words washing over my mouth so that I might taste the ire on them.
Light stirred within her silvery hair but I wasn’t sure she noticed it, or the way the Dragon amulet glinted with promise. The spirit was close, but she didn’t know how to wield it. Not unless I showed her. And I needed her on my side if I was going to use her to wield the Dragon for my own gain.
She pulled away from me, the air taut with tension and the imprint of her hand on my skin still burning hot.
“I meant no disrespect,” I muttered, and she narrowed her eyes in suspicion.
“No, there’s no intent to hurt my feelings behind your words because they’re not aimed at me as an insult. They’re a sign of your true beliefs about humans. And honestly, that’s worse.”
“Tell me about your people then. What am I getting so wrong?”
Her suspicion heightened but I gave her a patient look and hid a smile when she cracked and began to open up to me.
“We’re strong. Stronger than you think and in ways you don’t understand.”
“I see.”
“You don’t see,” she scoffed. “You’re Fae. You walk this world with the air of a god, not a creature that breathes and feels and truly lives.”
I frowned, seeing her belief in those words, and it made me crave something I couldn’t even put a name to. “What am I missing then, lightwing? Explain it to me as best you can.”
She slapped the cloth against my wounds again and I cursed, my fingers tightening on the edge of the tub. “There you go again with the patronising tone.”
“Fine. Forgive me,” I said through gritted teeth, and she went back to tending my wounds more gently.
“I don’t think life has meaning without death,” Ferris announced, and my throat tightened, her hammer striking the nail a little too close to my heart. “Immortality is too safe a game to play. Have you ever lost anyone, Hendrix? I mean really lost them? Before it was their time to go?” Her voice wavered, only a fraction, almost imperceptibly, but true pain lay there. A clue to her weakness. A thing I needed to dig out if I was going to learn the best way to control her. But there was more to it than that. I wanted to know, despite my better judgement. I was curious about this human, more so than I had been about anything in countless years. She confounded me, made me question things which I had long ago decided were fact, and I had to know what experiences had moulded the soul of this intriguing creature.
I thought on her question, my mind moving automatically to my past. Days of carefree joy with my family.
“No,” I growled, harsh and firm, blocking out all thoughts of the history I held onto.
“Then there’s no point in me trying to make you understand. Your life is void of all the injustices that ours isn’t. We have to face the unfairness and find a way to move forward, to live for those who can’t.”
“You think I know nothing of unfairness?” I gritted out, knowing it wasn’t the right response. Not when I was just trying to earn her trust. But I simply couldn’t keep my mouth closed. “You think my life is a dream that never ends? Well think again, girl.”
“What could possibly be so bad for a Fae? Even an outcast one. You have forever to right your wrongs. You have eternity to find peace again.”
“Peace?” I scoffed. “Peace is for sinless souls, not those like mine cloaked in misdeeds. You are so very naïve, you cannot see what I am.”
“What are you then?” she demanded, drawing the washcloth from my skin. “Because all I see is a privileged creature who has boundless time on his hands. He has no remorse, no conscience, just greed and power.”
“Privileged?” I barked a callous laugh, all plans of winning her over currently abandoned as my anger took centre stage. “You wouldn’t last a day in my shoes. If you walked one mile in my life, you would beg for your simple woes to be returned to you.”
I felt well enough to stand, so stand I did, stepping from the tub and glaring down at her, dripping wet and stark naked.
Her cheeks flushed as she glanced at my cock, then leapt to her feet, grabbing a towel and hurling it at me. I caught it with a mocking laugh as she backed away, flustered yet trying to act as though she wasn’t as she raised her chin defiantly. I held the towel in a fist so it hung down to cover me from navel to calf.
“You’re a pig,” she snapped, her hair shimmering with magic and her amulet gleaming against her chest.
The Dragon wanted to come and join the fight but that would do me no good. I had to keep it together so I could get her on my side.
I took a breath, calming my thoughts, wondering why this human got under my skin so deeply. I should have been able to manipulate her as easily as breathing, but instead she riled up a storm in my soul and shook the foundations of my plans practically before I’d laid them.
“Enough. Come now, a truce. There’s no use in arguing over whose life is shittier.”
“That’s not the argument I was making,” she growled, her gaze dipping to take in my dripping wet frame before her eyes shot back up to mine again, looking all the more furious.
I smirked, telling her I knew I’d distracted her, and her scowl deepened.
“The point is, life and loss go hand in hand. But between it all, there’s hope. Hope for better days. Hope for things that were lost to be found again.”
“What things?” I questioned, narrowing my eyes as I sensed she was hiding something from me still.
“Things that don’t concern you,” she said firmly, her jaw ticking, but she hadn’t run away yet, she remained there to swap barbs with me and in doing so, it gave me the chance I needed to convince her to trust me.
“Oh but they do, pretty one. We’re in this together now, you and I. So what is it that’s making you shiver like that?”
She glanced at the goosebumps which had risen along her arms. “My reason for being here is none of your business, as your reason is none of mine.”
“And what if I told you I’m here for the good of the world? Would you believe that?” I asked her.
“Not a chance.”
I laughed darkly. “Good, because of course I’m not. My reasons are purely selfish. What boon do you seek, Ferris Creed? Perhaps our wants align? You spoke of the Necromancer before, the Hollows must bring on a riot of fear in your fellow humans.”
“What does the Necromancer have to do with this?” She frowned.
“Perhaps I wish to stop him.”
“Liar. You said you’re here for selfish reasons.”
“Maybe I want him and the Hollows gone for motives of my own.”
“That’s not why you’re here,” she accused. “And if you think I’m here to wish for that too, then you’re dead wrong.”
I tilted my head to one side, intrigued as usual. “I thought you might be here to save the world.”
“Well I’m not,” she breathed, a hint of guilt to those words, but mostly there was conviction. “I know what I want.”
“Which is?”
She shook her head, eyes shining with her refusal to utter the truth.
I waited but she didn’t break.
“I gave you my truth,” I pushed.
“You’re a liar.”
I smiled, striding toward her but finding myself weak by the time I got there. She slinked into the doorway and I leaned against it, dipping my head toward her face, devouring her personal space and declaring it my own dominion.
“What’ve I got to do to earn your trust, lightwing?” My knees threatened to give out as stars burst before my eyes, highlighting her face like a beacon.
“I will never trust a Fae,” she whispered coldly.
“I see,” I growled, swaying forward as I leaned closer and throwing out my arm to catch myself on the doorframe behind her. I was consuming even more of her personal space, but she didn’t run. Perhaps if I was in a less weak state she would have.
“Well do me a favour at least,” I exhaled.
“What’s that?” she hissed.
“Don’t stare at my cock for too long when I hit the floor.” The blackness swept in and I staggered out into the hall, slamming down onto my back, losing my grip on the towel as I went.
My skull rattled as I woke up, blinking at the fire in a nearby brazier as it came into focus. I was in bed and one look down showed that I was covered with a blanket and my wounds were dressed with strips of what I guessed had once been a white sheet.
Ferris was curled up in an armchair across the room, her nose buried in the diary. The darkness beyond the window told me it was night, so I’d been out of it for at least a few hours.
“How did you get me into this bed?” I muttered, still dazed.
Ferris didn’t look up from her diary as she pointed to a rusted wheelbarrow across the room.
“How did you get me into that?”
She looked up reluctantly, a glimmer of amusement in her eyes. “You don’t remember?”
I shook my head.
“I found the old thing in the kitchen store, so I brought it upstairs, and after trying to lift you into it for spirits only know how long, I gave up and prodded you in that gash by your neck instead.”
I touched the wound with a frown, some vague recollection coming back to me now.
“Then you reared up with a cry like a dying goat and called me a ‘ravishing silver unicorn’ before you passed out again. When you fell, I shoved you into the wheelbarrow. I let you sleep in that for a while, and when you started moaning and mumbling about the Hollows, I steered you into your bed.” She shrugged like it was nothing and went back to reading.
“What did I say about the Hollows?” I asked lightly, like the question didn’t weigh a thousand tons.
“You kept saying ‘they’re waiting’ but I don’t know what for.”
I grunted.
“What did you mean?” she pushed, and I shrugged.
“Fuck knows.” But I did know.
Her eyes roamed over me, a slight frown pinching her brow as she assessed me all too keenly. I wasn’t used to anybody looking at me the way she did and I certainly wasn’t used to be surveyed in such a weakened state. I shifted in the sheets, waiting for her to call me out on my lies but even though I suspected she knew I’d been less than forthcoming with her, she didn’t push.
“You need to rest,” she stated finally, and I bristled at the assessment.
“Aw, have you been watching over me all curled up in your chair, pussycat?” I taunted.
Ferris snapped her diary shut and got out of her seat. “Just rest so we can get back to the task at hand,” she said cooly.
“Yes, your highness,” I mocked dryly.
She stalked from the room and kicked the door shut behind her, the space feeling altogether too empty in her absence, and I had to bite my tongue against the urge to call her back.
I was left with my own thoughts and a plate of food that had been provided for me to snack on. So snack I did. Because my little Dragon slayer needed me alive and kicking. And far be it from me to go dying on her. Not while I had a boon to claim.
It took another full day for me to feel strong enough to begin training Ferris in the ways of Summoning. But I was finally able to walk around freely without the assistance of my pet human and it was time to show her how to wield the Dragon.
We had spoken very little, so I’d had plenty of time to think on how I might sway her to work with me fully. Perhaps I was a little rusty on wooing others since I had been outcast for so many years. I didn’t keep the company of strangers often but the old me had been likeable enough. At least for a time. Maybe there were still sufficient pieces of him left in me to gain Ferris’s favour. She was only human after all, already easily glamoured by our kind. She may have hated us but she couldn’t help but be enraptured by us too.
I found her in the lounge, poring over that damn diary again. I was pretty sure she must have had it committed to memory by now, yet she continued to study it tirelessly as if it might offer up another secret with each turn of the page. She took notes too, sometimes comparing the writings in the diary with those in her precious book on the spirits of the forest. She was plotting, scheming, planning… I just wasn’t certain what precisely she thought a weak creature such as herself might achieve for all her efforts. Though the sting of her victory over the Dragon prickled against my attempts at dismissing her entirely. But that had been a fluke. I’d been the one to weaken it. The spirit should have been mine in truth.
I crept up behind her, noting the silken pink dress she wore. It hugged her figure and hung gracefully around her legs to caress her bare feet. Clearly she held no hostility towards the Fae-made items in this castle. Though I supposed she might have found amusement in stealing from those she despised so heartily. She didn’t notice my approach and didn’t stir at all until my shadow fell over her.
Ferris jerked around at the last moment, snapping the diary shut as if I might claim some of its secrets with a single glance, then she leapt from her seat.
“Well?” she prompted, glancing down to take in the fine linen shirt I had matched with trousers and shoes fit for a ball. She wasn’t the only one of us who could play dress-up in this pretty castle.
“Well what?” I drawled.
“Are we getting started at last?”
“It seems we are.” I offered her my hand and she glared at it like it was a viper about to strike. I moved it closer to her and she folded her arms in answer to my demand.
I fought the urge to snatch her hand and decided to play the part of someone more mannerly.
“I only wish to guide you in the skill of Summoning,” I offered.
“Stop.”
“Stop what?” I balked.
She waved her hand at me. “This. This weird act. I know what you’re doing.”
“I’m not doing anything but repaying the woman who saved my life. But if you don’t wish to learn to Summon, then so be it.” I turned my back on her, meaning to stride from the room, and smiling when she called out to me. Just as I’d known she would.
“I want to learn,” she insisted. “I’ll do whatever it takes.”
I turned to face her, offering her my hand again, a grin toying at the edge of my lips.
She reluctantly closed the distance between us and placed her smooth palm in mine. The discrepancy between our strength meant I could have crushed it like an autumn leaf, but instead, my fingers closed gently around hers and I drew her a step closer.
The scent of her skin was like oak on a summer breeze and I breathed her in despite myself, unable to deny the way my gaze trailed over the hard line of her lips and the musings about what it might take to thieve a smile from them.
“My father taught me how to summon,” I revealed, thinking of him and his rogue grin. He’d had plenty of enemies in his life, but he had never shown his ruthless nature to us. He cared for my mother and his children like there was nothing more precious than us in this world. He’d killed for us. And I’d killed for him in the end.
“I can show you how. But you have to trust me, Ferris, if only for now. For this moment in time. Can you do that?”
“I’m not sure I can,” she admitted, throat rising and falling. This dress wasn’t good enough for her. It paled significantly in the face of her beauty.
“Try,” I encouraged, catching her hand and twirling her under one arm and pulling her flush against my body, taking her other hand too. She stilled in my grasp but didn’t move away and I found I liked the feel of her closeness all too much.
“It’s a thought, nothing more,” I said, lowering my head to speak in her ear. “But it takes courage and a will of pure power. I know you possess that. I’ve seen it in you. But I think you doubt yourself sometimes, Ferris Creed.”
Her chest rose and fell, her answer coming in a soft exhale. “I’m working on that.”
“Work harder.” I called upon the Fox, its fiery nature keenly humming within the amulet. All I had to do was coax it free while keeping a leash on it with my mind, holding it back, making sure it listened to my command.
“It’s important to maintain control of your spirit. The Dragon is yours to summon, lightwing, but it may be volatile. It may resist. But once you learn to force your will over it, it will do anything you ask.”
“You mean it will do anything I demand.”
“Same thing.”
“It isn’t,” she hissed.
I bit back a retort, not wanting to fall into another argument right now.
“Just focus,” I encouraged, inching even closer to her, the scent of her skin enveloping me, her warmth a beat of temptation away. At this proximity, she would surely feel the rush of the Fox’s power as it raced from me, and perhaps knowing that feeling would be the key to unlocking it for herself. “See if you can feel it when I do it.”
“What do you mean fee- oh,” she gasped as I summoned the Fox.
I told the spirit to leave the amulet with a force of will, a command inside my head urging it to show itself. The rush of its magic moved closer, welling up within me like a vortex until my entire being crackled with the potency of its fire. It burst free, pouring from the amulet at my throat in a swirl of flames and landing in front of us, each flicker of fire collecting itself into its fur until the spirit sat beating its tail impatiently.
“Did you see how I did that?” I murmured, my lips brushing against the shell of her ear as the power of the Fox spirit shivered across my skin so close to hers. A river of energy was humming between us, bridging the gap from my soul to hers, allowing her to feel the very heartbeats in my chest. I could feel hers in kind, thrumming so powerfully, it wasn’t like any heart I had heard before. Certainly no human’s should beat like that, as if it was dictating life instead of the other way around.
“You must keep them collared,” I urged, lashing the energy spiralling out of the amulet around the Fox with a will of possessive power. “Now you try.”
“Alright,” Ferris breathed, squeezing my hands. She could have let go. I didn’t need to keep hold of her while she did this, but I didn’t release her either, only gripping tighter.
Her hair began to shine, shimmering teal appearing between the strands, alive with the power of the beast she’d claimed dominion over. The energy in the atmosphere buzzed with a potent power that spoke of the Dragon. I wanted to see it. I needed to look into its eyes and declare it mine. Ferris may have been its wielder, but I’d be hers soon enough.
Her concentration cracked and I felt the connection between her and the amulet splinter. She whirled away from me, throwing a hand to her face as if she didn’t want me to read the emotion on her face.
“What’s wrong?” I demanded.
“Nothing,” she gasped, but she dropped her hand and her eyes turned to the window, desperation sparking in her gaze.
“What is it?” I looked that way to where the sunlight gilded the forest canopy. But there was nothing there.
“I can’t fuck this up,” she said under her breath. “Everything depends on it.”
“You’d better try again then,” I instructed firmly, and she tore her gaze from the window, nodding and striding back toward me, thrusting her hands into mine.
She really didn’t need to do that. But as she moved closer, I didn’t let the words of protest pass my lips. I drew my little human into the cage of my arms and devoured the warmth she offered, not daring to let myself wonder why I didn’t ever want to let go.
