Chapter 8
Nadiya
What I learned in more than a day on the road: Idar is a robot.
During all this time he never stopped to sleep.
Of course, we made stops at gas stations to drink coffee or go to the toilet, but we didn’t stop anywhere for the night.
Maybe he just didn’t want to be alone in the room with me? Or maybe he was just rushing into town on some business.
And so, after more than twenty hours on the road, we entered the city.
I looked out the window, and when I saw the familiar high-rise buildings and avenues, peace reigned in my soul.
I’m home.
The road is the perfect time to talk, get to know each other better, and learn something important about each other.
For example, the fact that I’m a gynecologist. They say I’m even a good one. At least, that’s what I strive for.
And also that I’m allergic to seafood and I really love driving. That I have a younger brother who is disabled.
This is the perfect time for Idar to tell me what he does, whether he’s into sports, where he likes to hang out, and how many friends he has.
But all I’ve learned in the last twenty hours is that Idar hates talking.
Correction: talk to me.
Because the whole way he was calling his friends and his Olesya, who was whining into the phone that she didn’t want to travel in a reserved seat carriage.
Idar asked me about everyday things, like if I needed to go to the bathroom.
So I realized that it would be difficult for me with my husband.
Or maybe, on the contrary, it’s even for the better?
The less I know about him, the less his relationship with Olesya touches me.
Who knows, maybe my close connection with Idar will play a cruel joke on me and I will become attached to him?
I look at Idar’s profile, assessing him again.
Could I fall in love with him?
Probably – if he were kinder, more gentle with me, more caring.
But care and tenderness are meant for Olesya. I’ll only get Idar’s instructions: what to do, what to say, what to wear.
In general, it’s even for the best. If there’s no warmth from him, there won’t be any love from me. Perhaps we’ll settle for a feeling of gratitude to each other? And that’s all.
Gratitude is also a good feeling, our “family” can be based on it.
I try not to think about what I will do when Olesya gives birth to Idar’s child, putting this question off until later.
Because, in essence, this will change everything.
And you, Nadiya… don’t fall in love with him. Don’t fall in love, girl…
— Is this your house?
“Yes,” I look out the window and look at our multi-story block building.
Idar turns to me. He’s tired. His eyes are red, his face is pale. He needs sleep. And some glucose.
I mentally slap my inner doctor and throw my backpack over my shoulder.
“Are you sure you need your things?” she nods her chin at my outfit. “If everything is the same as what you’re wearing, then…”
“Then what?” I ask defiantly. “Defile your rich family with my cheap clothes?”
Yunusov quietly exhales:
“Baby, stop biting. You won’t succeed, your teeth haven’t grown back yet.”
I squeeze the strap of my backpack, and at the same time my teeth, so as not to blurt out something unnecessary.
— I wanted to offer to give you money for a new wardrobe.
– No.
Idar rolls his eyes:
– Who would doubt it?
— I’ll pack my things and come to you. Send me the address on my phone.
– I’ll wait.
– No. I need to talk to my brother. It won’t be quick.
– How will you get there?
“By car,” I point at my old Mercedes, which my parents left me. “I’ll be fine, but you go home. Go to bed, or something.”
– It’s none of your concern.
“Yes, please,” I chuckle. “If you fall asleep at the wheel and crash into a wall, that’s even better, I’ll inherit it.”
I jump out of the car and run to the entrance. Let him rage on his own.
I rush to my brother’s apartment, skipping steps at a time. I stop at the door and quickly turn the key in the lock.
– Nazarka! – I shout from the doorway.
My brother has learned to do almost everything himself, so I can leave him at home for a couple of days.
– Nadya!
Nazar drives out into the hallway. I drop my backpack and run, falling to my knees in front of my brother and hugging him.
Before the accident, he was a boxer. He was muscular and built strong. He was on a high-protein diet, building muscle.
Two years passed, and he became skinny. He had practically no muscle.
For about six months, I pulled my brother out of depression, then he had a complicated operation, followed by another. Then depression returned. He ate poorly and didn’t sleep.
Cried.
I was ashamed of it.
– You’ve arrived!
“Of course,” I kiss him on the top of his head. “How are you?”
“It’s boring,” he sighs. “I went outside once.”
— It’s good that you didn’t sit at home.
— How was the wedding, Nadya?
Nazar is a smart boy, and I think he understands why I agreed to this marriage.
— A wedding is a wedding.
I lie to my brother that everything went well. I tell him that I need to go see my husband, but… not today.
I have to be here today.
Nazar and I spend the evening alone. I cook him enough food for a couple of days. After all, I promised Idar that I would live with him in his house.
But I can’t leave Nazar here alone either. Simply because he needs someone by his side. Alone, he’ll go crazy.
The evening turns out to be quiet. We watch a show on TV and laugh.
It’s as if this wedding never happened. Only the ring on my finger reminds me that two days ago I became a bride.
I sleep peacefully. More sweetly than I’ve slept in a long time. Apparently, fatigue is taking its toll.
And in the morning there is an insistent ringing at the door of my apartment.
