In their stateroom, Meredith stared at the clothes in the closet and realized she didn’t have her bag. Hell, she didn’t even have her purse. All of it was back on the island, along with her passport, wallet, keys, everything. Perching on the edge of the bed, she drummed her fingers restlessly against her leg and then bounced up to walk again.

How could he just make unilateral decision? Risk his life? Did he expect her to simply nod her head? Pacing back and forth, she glared at the door and then dragged her fingers through her hair. Her emotions waxed and waned between fury at his highhandedness and terror at the idea of him putting himself out there.

From one end of the room to the other she went. It made her so mad she wanted to scream or throw something. Spinning around, she stalked to the door and opened it. Gencome glanced at her, and she gave him a tight smile. “I’m going to the medical bay. Are you planning on stopping me?”

The Frenchman raised his eyebrows. “No, ma’am. My orders are only to keep you safe.”

“Excellent.” She closed the door behind her and headed down the passageway. She found Terry half-asleep, face gray with fatigue, but looking better than he did the first day she’d visited him. The nurse stepped out when Meredith took her place next to the bed and Gencome waited outside the door to give her a tacit amount of privacy.

The wounded man opened his eyes and focused on her. He started to try and sit up and she scowled. “Stay put.” What was wrong with men? Did they really think they were invincible? “I just wanted to come and check on you.”

“You’re upset.” He studied her with a small frown.

“I’ll get over it.” As much as it pained her to admit it, she probably would. What choice did she have? If she wanted Bastian, she would have accept him as he was.

“You don’t sound terribly happy about the fact.” Terry shifted again. A thick swath of bandages coated his shoulder and stretched across his chest. The bullets, she’d been told, tore through his shoulder and broke his clavicle. It could have been a lot worse, even though it looked less than pleasant at the moment.

Her gut churned. Just a few months before, Bastian was in this room with only his bodyguards and the doctor who treated him. She’d been thousands of miles away and then, like now, Bastian hadn’t wanted her there. A headache pulsed behind her eye.

Pushing aside the lingering fear, she leaned forward and put her hand on Terry’s. “Are we friends?”

“After a fashion. What’s wrong?”

“If I ask you something, can you promise me confidence? I mean, you told me once I could say anything to you and no matter what I said, you wouldn’t share. That’s kind of like being a friend, right? Because, right now, I could use a friend.” She really hoped she knew what she was doing, but she was so confused. Is there a right decision?

“Meredith, yes, I’m your friend, but it’s secondary to being your bodyguard. In either capacity, I wouldn’t break your trust. What’s wrong?” Despite sounding weak, Terry gave her a firm look. “Tell me.”

She opened her mouth then closed it again. The words she wanted to vent wouldn’t be easily said, and it felt like a betrayal to confide in Terry. Though he’d calmed since he’d asked her if she was sleeping with him, her fondness for the bodyguard made Sebastian uncomfortable. Rather than complaining, she summoned a smile. “It’s nothing, really. I’m leaving tomorrow to go home. I don’t think you’re well enough to travel with me.”

Terry frowned. “Do you have someone going with you?”

“Yes. Sebastian brought in a new bodyguard for me.”

“Claude Gencome. He’s a good enough man and he came to see me a couple of days ago to ask about your schedule.”

A couple of days… Of course, he did. Meredith bit back another sigh. Sebastian planned it all along. “Well, I want you to concentrate on getting better. I’m going to finish packing. Call me when you’re able to come home? I’ll make you a cake or something.” The last sounded lame, but he’d been hurt while looking after her.

He nodded slowly, but despite his weakened state, his gaze remained sharp. “Are you sure you’re all right?”

“No.” But that was all she planned to share on the subject. “However, I’ll figure it out. I have to.” Pressing a kiss to his cheek, she straightened. “Rest. Get better. I’ll see you later.” And then she was on the move again, with Gencome following.

Detouring again, she headed straight for the kitchen. She couldn’t leave the yacht in the middle of another disagreement with Sebastian. No, she didn’t like what he was planning and, yes, she’d strenuously objected to being dictated to, but walking away mad wasn’t the solution either. Philippe proved amenable to her request and promised to have the dinner set up exactly to her specifications.

Back in the stateroom, she took a shower and after, she dried her hair and returned to the closet to pilfer one of Sebastian’s shirts. Maybe she could pack a few to take with her. She’d just finished buttoning it when a knock sounded. Snagging a robe, she pulled it on and answered the door. It wasn’t the porter with the meal she’d ordered, but Gencome.

“This came for you, ma’am.” He handed her a note and the sound of rotors echoed from overhead. Nodding to him, she withdrew into the room and unfolded the slip of paper.

Meredith,

I don’t want to fight with you. I know you’re upset, and I wish I could say the magical words to ease your concern. Unfortunately, I simply don’t have them. We’ve been forced to escalate the timetable again and, in this, I have no flexibility. I’m leaving for Belaria tonight. Gencome will escort you from the ship tomorrow in Italy. Kate will have your things, including your passport. I will call you as soon as I can.

All my love,

Sebastian

She stared at the note and, even as the content sank in, she realized the sound of the rotors retreated. He’d left.

Just like that, he was gone. Pacing slowly across the room, she sat down on the edge of the bed. She’d crumpled the note in her hand and she unfolded it carefully and reread it. He didn’t want to fight with her, so he’d simply left. He promised to call her, but she didn’t have her cell phone anymore.

How could he simply leave?

Because I would have objected…and I walked out angry again. Maybe he’d done the right thing. She wanted the man so much it hurt, but God help her, she didn’t know if she wanted his life.

By the time she boarded the plane in Ravello, Meredith was a bundle of nerves. As expected, Kate Braddock waited for her onboard with all of her papers. Gencome proved to be a capable companion, but the Frenchman said very little and his watchfulness only increased her tension. She’d received no phone call from Sebastian, but maybe he was still en route in Belaria. It wasn’t as though he’d told her how he planned to travel or mentioned his expected arrival time.

It made her sick to her stomach with worry, and she was quiet when she settled into the seat across from Kate. After buckling in, she stared out the window. Had it been merely a week since she’d sat in the same seat? Her entire world shifted in the space of seven days.

All around her, staff prepared the private plane for takeoff and she sighed.

“You look tired,” Kate said into the quiet, reminding Meredith of her presence. Where on the first flight Terry sat next to her, Gencome chose another set of seats closer to the main door which allowed her a modicum of privacy.

“Then I look how I feel.” She tried for a smile, but gave up when even her poor attempt seemed more trouble than it was worth. “Thank you for bringing my things.”

“No problem.” The other woman settled back and crossed one leg over the other. “It gets easier.”

“What does?”

“The lifestyle of being royal and under siege.” A faint smile curved the other woman’s lips, but Meredith couldn’t tell if she was serious or not based on her dry tone.

“I thought you were engaged to an attorney.” Meredith wasn’t sure if the same rules applied.

“I am and he spends a lot of time with the family.” When she didn’t offer further details, Meredith assumed she was done. The jets outside began to power up and the plane began to taxi forward. “But the key to surviving all the nonsense is to focus on what’s important.”

Digging her fingers into the armrests, Meredith tried to ignore the churning in her gut as the plane began to hurtle down the runway. “You’re being subtle on purpose and I appreciate the effort, but my heart isn’t in this particular game at the moment.”

“I’m not playing a game. Being royal kind of sucks. Don’t get me wrong, it has perks, too. It’s definitely a trade-off.” Kate shrugged. “Of course, I don’t understand you and Sebastian.”

“What do you mean?” She blew out a breath and studied her companion, but Kate’s expression bordered on neutral.

“It means exactly what I said. I don’t understand you. The two of you were in a relationship for five years. One day, you decided it was over and pretty much gave up. When you told him it’s over, he moved heaven and earth to get you both in the same place. I get it didn’t go as well as you might have hoped and bullets are not a romantic enhancement, but I was under the impression you two worked things out. Instead, when I talked to him, he sounded dead inside. Now, you look like someone kicked your dog.”

The plane leveled and Meredith’s stomach lodged somewhere near her feet. “He left without saying goodbye after we fought because he’d made decisions without including me.” She disliked everything about the situation.

Kate nodded as if her answer made perfect sense. “Okay.”

Her simple response gave Meredith pause. “Okay?”

“Yeah, okay. At least it explains why you look like someone kicked your dog.” A light flashed overhead. Kate pulled her cellphone out of her pocket and checked the screen.

“I’m glad I enlightened you.” Fresh irritation rasped her already bad mood.

The other woman didn’t look up from the cell phone. “Don’t snap at me. I didn’t let him do it.”

“I hardly think I did, either. You participated in the charade to get me to the island in the first place, so obviously you know more about the whole situation than I have been advised. Do me a favor? Either fill me in or leave me alone.”

Setting the phone down on her thigh, Kate pinned her with a stare. “You know for someone who is arguably a genius—and yes, I did look at your background check and your record—you’re really dumb.”

Meredith felt her jaw go slack. The statement, delivered in calm assessment, lacked the sting of insult, yet delivered a more than solid whack to her pride.

“Seriously, you see a man for five years, let him set all the terms and you know he’s been raised to be in charge. He lives in a world where decisions come down like they are at the right hand of God, yet you’re shocked when he doesn’t involve you?” Kate’s brows inched upwards. “Word to the wise? You want to be involved, you involve yourself.”

“You make it sound so easy.” Meredith spread her hands and leaned forward.

“If it were easy, it probably wouldn’t be worth it. I like this family. They’re arrogant, and they’re more than a little entitled at times, but they’re good people. So, decide if you want to be with him or not. Decide who you want to be when you’re at his side because, if you don’t, this life will crush you like a bug then you won’t be good for anyone, least of all him.” If the first wasn’t enough, she wasn’t finished. “He wants to protect you more than he does his own life. He was the target on the island, yet he covered you. He keeps the press out of your life and very focused on him, but when you stood up to him, what happened?”

Who the hell was this woman to judge? Meredith’s spine stiffened and she lifted her chin. “He tricked me into meeting him, a brilliant move on his part.” One she could applaud for tackling game theory when her response was the most uncertain variable he faced and he’d done it. His actions were beautifully romantic. “I love him. I have decided where I want to be and maybe I won’t be any good at it, but I assure you, I can learn anything and I will learn how to do this. This trip he’s on? It’s dangerous, but he refused to let me go with him.”

“Men. Brilliantly possessive, incredibly protective, and wildly hardheaded. And you let him leave?”

“I could hardly stop him.” What did Kate want her to do?

“All right, I’ll grant you that. Let me ask you this, what are you doing on this plane?”

“I’m flying home.”

“Why?”

“Because—”Meredith stopped. Because Sebastian made the arrangements and told her she was going home. Because Sebastian wanted her somewhere safe and far away from him while he risked his life. Because⁠—

“And now she’s thinking again.” Kate picked up her phone.

Every decision he’d made with regard to their relationship was driven by the need to protect her and… to help me achieve my dreams. Isn’t that what he said? I wanted to be a tenured professor. I wanted to be published. I wanted to write my own ticket for the types of problems I wanted to solve…and I have all of those things. Her achievements came at a price—being excluded from Sebastian’s life, at least the public side of it.

She’d never questioned his devotion to his family, but even with them, he’d buried his own dreams—his paintings—so he could help his brother. The trip to Belaria, literally walking into the lion’s den, he did for the rest of his family and for her. He put everyone else before himself. Who put Sebastian first?

“I don’t suppose I can change the course on this flight, can I?” Would the pilot even listen to her? She and Sebastian weren’t even formally engaged, at least, she didn’t think they were.

“Well, it’s definitely a possibility, but I didn’t tell you all of this so you’d rush to be at his side. He wasn’t wrong when he said this trip is dangerous.” Was the other woman reconsidering her suggestion? Too bad.

“I should probably talk to Armand…” Hopefully he wouldn’t mind her calling him by his given name. “I don’t suppose you have his number?”

After unbuckling her seatbelt, Kate rose and held out the cell phone. “Sebastian asked me to bring this for you. It has direct contact numbers for everyone in the family, including my fiancé. Before you call His Highness, I’d suggest Mr. Voldakov as this is his plane.”

Meredith stared at the phone as though it might actually bite her and then blinked as the other woman headed down the aisle. “Where are you going?”

“To call Peterson. If you’re heading for Belaria, we’re going to need boots on the ground.” Kate grinned wryly. “Then I have to call Richard, so he doesn’t have an aneurism about me going with you.”

“Is he going to get mad?” She didn’t want to cause problems for Kate Braddock, no matter how beautifully she’d manipulated the argument. Although Meredith noted the manipulation, she’d give credit where credit was due—Kate’s actions jarred her out of the pit of self-despair. It was a well-deserved kick in the ass.

“Probably, but like I said, you want to be involved, you involve yourself. Richard loves this family, and so do I. Since I lit the match, I have no problem seeing it through. We’re still going to take precautions.” Kate glanced over at Claude. “Aren’t we, Mr. Gencome?”

“Absolutely, Miss Braddock. I would, however, appreciate it if you two never planned world domination.”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Kate winked at Meredith with a grin. “We’d be great at it.” With that, she left Meredith alone to make her final decision. She could choose to call Daniel Voldakov and ask him to change the plane’s flight orders. She could head to Belaria and find Sebastian, and then park herself at his side. But I’m a professor of mathematics, not some action heroine in an Angelina Jolie movie.

She worked with variables and equations. Everything about the trip was out of her realm of experience. It’s like when you’re in classroom. You have to be firm, but compassionate. Sebastian’s words echoed back at her. We don’t want their throne, so we have to prove we don’t to them…

The uncertainty principle inherent in every equation relied on balancing factors. Even a decimal point off could change the whole result. Scrolling through the contact list, Meredith selected Daniel’s name and pressed dial. When he answered, she took a deep breath. “Mr. Voldakov—” She paused. They’d corresponded for months and talked on a few occasions. “Daniel? It’s Meredith Blake. I need your help to move a decimal.”