Chapter 78
“Rigel, are you sure?” Elvira looked at me incredulously. “For Salazar Slytherin to set up an entrance in such a place…”
As we walked through the second floor, I quickly and briefly told Smith about the Chamber of Secrets and the enormous basilisk that resided there, not forgetting to mention the black notebook, aka the dark and dangerous artifact. The girl was impressed and readily agreed to help. She was only confused by the possible location of the entrance to the abode of the great “dark” mage of antiquity, and I can understand her in a way. If someone had blurted out to me that Alucard had constructed the entrance to his underground palace in the women’s shower, I would have twirled my finger at my temple and told that idiot to go fuck himself (somewhere in London, an ancient monster’s nose was seriously itchy).
“I know it sounds like complete nonsense, but I need to check.” I shrugged. “We don’t have any other leads anyway, especially since this source of information has never let me down.”
“And about the location…” Hermione, walking next to him, paused. “How do we know what was in this room a thousand years ago? Plumbing hadn’t been invented back then, and latrines were built on a completely different principle.”
“That’s also true. Most likely, during the castle’s reconstruction and refurbishment, one of Slytherin’s descendants hid this entrance from outsiders.” Her dark-haired friend nodded in response. “And he added the snake as an identification mark for his own people.”
“We’ll check then.” I smiled encouragingly at my friends. “I don’t know exactly what it looks like, but it should be something like the Slytherin crest. Probably.”
“Maybe we should ask Vasya?” Elvira glanced sideways at the insolent slob whose well-fed snout was currently dozing on my shoulder. “He was there.”
“There was, but we can’t fit through that vent, and he doesn’t know any other way, or maybe he just doesn’t want to talk.” I involuntarily stroked my familiar’s head.
– Vasya says it’s better not to go in there, so if we find an entrance, we’ll set up a surveillance camera and report it to the director, let him deal with it himself.
“Or maybe just blow it up?” Hermione’s eyes took on a fanatical glint. “I’ve got a high-explosive aerial bomb with me, just in case…”
– What? – I stumbled on level ground and carefully turned to my friend. – Mia, we agreed that you would leave this crap in my suitcase… But what if someone accidentally damages your bag?
“There’s going to be a big boom…” The big gun lover smiled and shrugged. “I just thought this morning: what if we find the entrance today? Open the door, throw Fatty in, and that’s it!”
“Girls, have you seen a psychiatrist lately?” Elvira stopped to the side and looked at us with a very strange look. “Did you really bring a one-and-a-half-ton aerial bomb to Hogwarts?! Are you crazy?!”
“What’s wrong?” Hermione looked at her friend in confusion. “Rigel even has a suicide belt, it’s got about a hundred kilograms of explosives in it, plus shrapnel. We can show you this evening.”
– Abnormal… – Smith sighed heavily and looked at me. – How do you say? Crazy?
“Elvira’s right, we can’t blow up the passage to the Chamber of Secrets.” Mia looked at me indignantly and snorted discontentedly. “Let me explain. Firstly, the castle is old and could partially collapse, okay?” The girls nodded, though some of them seemed reluctant. “Secondly, this room is a thousand years old, it could be of historical or other value, artifacts or antiques in there, and they’re expensive and school property! Who’s going to pay for that?” The girls nodded again. “And thirdly, there’s an intelligent relic monster living there that remembers Salazar himself! Can you imagine how much it knows?! Plus, it’s the school’s guardian, you can’t kill it.”
“Are you sure this basilisk can’t harm the students?” Elvira glanced warily at Vasya, probably imagining a similar hose, only the size of a commuter train.
“You read Hogwarts: A History yourself, the normal one, the one my grandfather passed down to me.” I smiled encouragingly at my friend. “He’s smart, after all.”
– There was once… The Old One’s brain is completely overgrown with mold… – My familiar muttered sleepily. – The Old One is strong, but f*cked up…
“Girls, stop chatting, we’re here.” Mia stopped in front of Moaning Myrtle’s abode. “Who’s first?”
“Just a second,” I said, opening the door with a sly grin and pointing my wand inside. “Mortis rAptimus!” A black sphere erupted from the tip of the concentrator, and a few moments later, a shrill female scream erupted from the toilet.
With a blissful smile on my lips, I listened to the cries of pain and despair of one fucked-up ghost—that is, a replica of Myrtle Warren’s personality. According to the films of the past and the rumors of the present, this girl died tragically in this very toilet. Naturally, no one knows the details, and I didn’t find even a mention of the incident in the newspapers.
I don’t know what Myrtle was like in life, but after she died, she went completely nuts and started doing all sorts of crazy things. Last year, that blob of ectoplasm scared the shit out of me! I went into the bathroom to relieve myself, made sure no one was there, and calmly settled into the white throne with a book in my hands. At the crucial moment, that bastard emerged from the toilet and, laughing loudly, touched me right between the buns, dousing my ass with ice water in the process. I nearly stuttered with fear, and in the process, I smashed several stalls. Mia laughed at me at first, but then she imagined an otherworldly scream coming from the toilet in complete silence, and someone’s icy hand touching her there…
We never mentioned that shameful embarrassment again, but I’m very vindictive and spiteful. From then on, whenever I passed by, I’d always practice a banishment spell. And almost always successfully, you know, like today.
After waiting a couple more minutes, we entered the flooded room; this idiot was probably trying to put out the black flame in the toilet again, and, as always, without success.
Ghosts are merely soulless imprints of personality, almost incapable of learning or absorbing new information, much like living portraits. Both reminded me of a flawed artificial intelligence with a ban on self-development. They could remember things: the names of students, deans, or even certain events, but this occurred according to an incomprehensible principle. The fat woman who “lives” at the entrance to our common room always greets Hermione but looks at me as if for the first time. For the same reason, password changes require presentation of a prefect’s badge, since she also refuses to recognize or remember Percy and Demelza. Ghosts and living portraits seem sentient; you can even have interesting conversations with them, but only about what happened before their death; they have a poor understanding and assimilation of anything that happened afterward. Perhaps this is for the best; these creatures are immortal by nature, and only the Creator knows what they might have come up with over hundreds of years.
After looking around and confirming that Myrtle had left, we began exploring the spacious room. This restroom was no different from the others, with a standard layout. Ten blue wooden stalls lined the walls, left and right. This entire honor guard abutted a beige-tiled wall, which was lined with mirrors and marble sinks with gilded metal faucets. The interior was completed by two large oval windows and several small floor drains, where Myrtle’s spilled water was now being collected.
“The snake should be engraved on one of the faucets, I think.” I gave my friends the final instructions. “Look more carefully, by the way, Revelio!” “Alas, but nothing has changed.”
“It was worth a try…” Hermione patted me on the shoulder encouragingly and leaned over the nearest sink.
I nodded in response and, moving forward a little, stopped in front of the central sink, while Elvira began searching on the other side. After checking myself in the mirror and fixing my hair, I carefully examined the tiled basin, then the faucet, even turning on the water, just in case. I spent about fifteen minutes, even checking the trap, but didn’t find what I was looking for, so I moved on to the next…
An hour and a half later, I found myself next to Hermione and, meeting her gaze, shook my head. My friend did the same. Disgusting! This damn hole should be here! In the movie, there was…
– Elvira, did you find anything? – I shouted to the black-haired girl who was diligently snoring on the other side.
“Just a couple of drawn dicks and the caption: ‘Gail Hailstorn – swallows.’ Nothing else…” Smith’s guilty voice was heard.
– Do you still have much?
– There are seven shells left.
“Let’s go to your place!” I grabbed Hermione by the sleeve and dragged her toward Elvira. As the genre dictates, the latter would be the one…
– What the hell?! It should definitely be here! – An hour later, I was pacing around the dry toilet. – Are you sure you checked everything thoroughly?
– Riya, there’s nothing here, it’s just a toilet… – Hermione began to calm me down. – Maybe your source was wrong?
“It’s unlikely, everything matched up until now!” I paused, lost in thought, and looked up. Alas, the washbasin I was looking for wasn’t there either.
“Rigel, maybe the entrance is in one of the stalls?” Elvira said, drawing attention to herself. “That makes more sense: lock the latch, press the flush or the hidden lever, and you’re in the Secret Room.”
– An idea! – The enthusiasm of a pioneer awakened in me. – There’s still time, so let’s check out the cabins!
I rushed to the nearest one and practically kicked open the wooden door. Then I began to carefully examine the white throne with its wooden seat, then the hanging cistern with its rusty chain. Finding nothing, I moved on to the next room of reflection, while the Columbus inside me began to doubt my chosen direction.
– Eww! Evanesco! – Hermione’s disgusted cry was heard nearby. – What kind of pigs are these?! Is it really that hard to wash away after yourself?
“Agreed! Evanesco!” Elvira confirmed her words from another corner of the toilet. “Tampons?! Where did they come from? There are potions, you take them once a month and that’s it.”
“Firstly, not everyone knows about them, and secondly, they’re expensive.” The curly-haired witch adopted a lecturing tone. “So, the simpleton girls use the usual products.”
“I see,” Smith replied nasal. “Girls, whatever you want, but after dinner I’m going to look for an air purification charm! This is unbearable! The whole toilet is covered in sh…”
– Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. – I don’t know why, but I wanted to encourage my friends, and maybe myself, with words from the Holy Scripture.
“Who’s arguing?” Hermione replied grumpily.
– Found it! – Elvira’s joyful cry made me jump and spin around. – Or… Stand down… It’s a dick again, though it’s skinny and crooked somehow…
“It reminds me of an earthworm…” My best friend’s thoughtful, interested voice came from the same corner. “But it looks similar from a distance… Maybe I should add the tongue?”
– Girls! – I growled angrily.
– That’s it… We continue our search for the Chamber of Secrets. – Smith began to calm me down. – Hermione, is your marker far away?
It took us almost two hours to explore all the stalls, during which time I saw my fill of shit-stained toilets and a whole exhibition of various rock art, but we still couldn’t find the entrance to the Secret Room. So I went to dinner angry and pensive, and my friends were in much the same mood.
So here come the differences from the films. In first year, everything was simple: Quirrell, the dragon, the stone—it all matched up, even the timelines seemed to line up. But now?! Where can I find that fucking diary and the entrance to Salazar’s cellar?
Hogwarts is enormous, and not just from the outside; I sometimes thought it was built by drunk and stoned migrant workers. There was no other way to explain the disappearing steps, the wandering classrooms, and the corridors folded like Klein bottles. Spreading charms were heavily used in many places, including the Great Hall, the size of which always corresponded to the number of students. And after reading the uncensored Hogwarts: A History, I was completely stunned! Dozens of passages and classrooms appeared only on certain days or months! For example, the shortcut to the sixth-floor staircase only worked on even days, and the door to the spacious fifth-floor room only appeared in September and May. Why?! Who builds things like that?! And how are you supposed to find the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets when there are plenty of equally secret rooms?! But I don’t really care; the ancient wizard’s chambers hold little interest for me, while the diary…
Grandpa and Uncle Alik both declared that a piece of the Scum’s soul languished in the black notebook, meaning I had to destroy it, preferably in the most painful and torturous way possible. But where, and most importantly, who should I look for it from?! According to the films, the veracity of which I was beginning to doubt, it looked like a simple black A5 notebook, the kind almost every student and professor had, and I had a couple dozen of them myself. Well, wizards like black, and Lavender was an exception, which meant she was, like Caesar’s wife, above suspicion. So what should I do?! Where should I dig?! Or should I just forget about it and wait for events to unfold?
With these thoughts in mind, I went down to dinner with my friends. Taking my seat, I nodded silently to the guys across from me and reached for fried chicken and baked potatoes. Fatty foods aren’t good for you in the evening, but I needed to eat to relieve stress. The girls were right behind me, and Mia even piled a whole plate of steaks on herself. Ron and Justin, understanding our mood, kept their distance and quietly watched.
– Guys, are you going to the library? – Having finished with the meat dishes, I leaned my elbows on the table, full, and turned to my friends.
“No, we’ve already been there,” Ron smiled and waved his hand. “We’ve done our homework, and I’ll write the essay for the bat tomorrow.”
“By the way, Transfiguration and Charms are on Monday.” Mia nudged me. “We still have summer assignments to write.”
“I won’t give you mine anymore!” Ron folded his arms over his chest. “I’ve had enough potions, and if McGonagall and Flitwick turn on me, well, that’s it.”
– Justin? – I looked at Finch-Fletchley with the eyes of the cat from Shrek. – You wouldn’t say no to your friends, would you?
“Don’t look at me like that…” The guy tried to turn away, but met Hermione’s gaze. “Just don’t copy it exactly…”
– You’re a true friend! – I accepted several expensive, heavy folders from Justin. – We’ll settle up!
“Definitely,” the young aristocrat grumbled and turned to his friend. “Ron, maybe we should play Monopoly today?”
– Mono… What? – Weasley frowned in confusion. – I don’t know that game.
– Oh, really?! Are you serious? – Finch-Fletchley was surprised. – It’s a fantastic board game! The rules are complicated, of course, but I’ll teach you.
– Intrigued… – Weasley finished his pumpkin juice with one slice of bread and got up from the table. – What is it about?
“Monopoly is an economic strategy game where you have to grow your business without going bankrupt.” Justin also stood up from the table. “Basically, there’s a game board with a lot of stuff on it, and we take turns rolling the dice…”
– I’ve never played this game, I’ve only heard about it… – Elvira looked at the boys with resentment. – I want to too!
“The more people, the merrier!” Finch-Fletchley smiled at the black-haired girl. “Come with us!”
“I’ll do my homework tomorrow too,” Smith rose from her seat and, taking her summer assignments out of her bag, handed them to Hermione.
“Maybe we should take a break too?” Mia looked thoughtfully at the backs of her friends hurrying into the common room, and then her gaze fell on the stack of Transfiguration essays. “Later… Someday…”
– Especially since we promised Ginny and Luna. – I smiled encouragingly at my best friend and stood up. – Let’s go gnaw on the granite of science!
“I hope I don’t wear down my teeth,” Hermione grumbled and followed my example. “Even though I’m the daughter of dentists…”
We left the Great Hall in high spirits, our full stomachs making themselves felt. On the third floor, passing a large window, we paused for about ten minutes, silently admiring the sunset. Having enjoyed the beautiful spectacle, we headed to the library.
The vault of knowledge greeted us with silence and the scent of ink. I don’t know why, but magical books always smelled like new; even a centuries-old tome looked as if it had just been printed yesterday. After greeting Madam Pince, I looked around the reading room and quickly found a gray-haired girl sitting alone at a distant table.
“Hi! Where’s Ginny?” I plopped down opposite Luna with a smile. Mia took the next chair and rummaged through her bag for her writing utensils.
“Hello, RiHel, ‘Mione.” Lovegood looked up from her parchment and looked at us with her “blind” eyes. “Seven is looking for a Potions book; Professor Prince assigned her an essay on wolfsbane. He’s strange, seemingly evil, but so miserable, I genuinely feel sorry for him…”
“Who? Greasy-haired, perhaps?” Hermione pulled a stack of parchments from her bag and looked at Luna with a puzzled expression. “Killing this freak isn’t enough! I’d gladly boil him in a cauldron of boiling oil, and before that I’d skin him alive, I hate him!”
“I agree, that big-nosed freak pisses me off too.” I nodded to my friend and grinned predatorily. “It’ll take a long time to skin him, it’s easier to impale him, he’s thick and gnarled.”
“You shouldn’t do that…” Luna shook her head sadly. “Severus is very unhappy, he blames himself for…”
– Girls, hi! – A happy Ginny hung behind us. – What are you chatting about?
“We’re thinking about the best way to kill the Prince. I suggest flaying him, and Rhea wants to impale him.” Hermione smiled at the red-haired girl. “Your suggestion?”
– Hmm… – Seventh Weasley glanced at a couple of hefty tomes in her hands. – I need to think… Maybe I should just bludgeon him with this book or make him eat a kilo of aconite?
“Girls, stop it, you can’t be so cruel.” Luna looked at us disapprovingly. “Severus hates himself, that’s why he acts like the most terrible person in the world… Deep down, he’s completely different, a good person…”
“You always feel sorry for everyone.” Ginny interrupted her friend and took the next chair. “Luna, understand, not all people are good, how many times do I have to tell you that?”
“You just don’t see everything.” Lovegood smiled slyly and took one of the books Ginny had brought. “Thank you.”
Luna opened a thick magizoology reference book and began flipping through it quickly, pausing only on the illustrations and headings. We merely shrugged and got busy, Ginny copying the text from the book, and Mia and I, so as not to embarrass our friends, trying to spice up their summer essays with our own words. The next hour passed with the scratching of pens and the rustling of pages—I love these kinds of gatherings.
“There’s nothing here either.” Luna closed the book and looked at me thoughtfully. “RiHel, are you upset about something? Your brain-scramblers are going crazy, did something happen?”
“Something like that…” I sighed sadly and looked into the whitish eyes. “We were looking for something today, but we didn’t find it. Although I was sure…”
“It’s the same with me. I also thought Newt Scamander must have encountered and described the Crinkle-Horned Snorkacks, but there’s no mention of them in his book.” The girl smiled sadly and looked at the bookcases. “Then I’ll have to look elsewhere. Up above, I saw The Evil Encyclopedia of Monsters and The Invisible Book of Invisible Creatures. I just got the wrong shelf; what if you got something mixed up too?”
– Maybe… – I thought. – Maybe we’re on the wrong floor…
“You see, it’s all quite simple!” Luna said, rising from her chair. “Last summer, I spent a week looking for my favorite pencil. I clearly remembered leaving it on the bookshelf in the bedroom, but it turned up in the bathroom. The shelves are identical, but the bedroom is on the second floor, and the bathroom is on the first.”
“Fuck…” Hermione saw my gaze and hit her forehead on the table, then quietly whispered. “Now I’ll have to inspect all the toilets in Hogwarts…”
“There are only twenty-one of them, it says so in Hogwarts, a History.” Lovegood sympathetically patted her friend on the shoulder and disappeared into the depths of the library.
“What were you looking for?” The red-haired girl looked up from her essay and chuckled cheerfully. “Nargles or heliopaths?”
“Something in between, but also mythical.” I chuckled cheerfully in response and, remembering something, reached into my bag. “Ginny, I almost forgot! Here, I read it and now I’m returning it.”
I placed an old home economics book and an infrared torch in front of the girl, a very primitive design that made it work perfectly at Hogwarts. Ginny didn’t get into the House of the Brainy for nothing; maybe some of this dark stuff will come in handy.
“What’s this?” The red-haired girl carefully put the book away in her bag and was now examining my gift. “Some kind of strange flashlight…”
“It shines with a special light,” I began to explain. “You can read the shaded pages that way, just don’t tell Mom.”
– Are you serious? – The girl was taken aback, and then looked at the flashlight as if it were a Great Artifact. – That simple? – I nodded. – Even Bill couldn’t handle this ink, and he’s a first-class spellcaster and potion maker!
“Everything ingenious is simple.” I shrugged.
“Thank you!” Ginny reached across the table and gave me a big hug.
“Girls, it’s time to wrap things up, there’s forty minutes left until lights out.” Hermione interrupted our hugs.
“You go ahead, I still have to wait for Luna.” Weasley pulled away from me and started putting things in her bag. “She won’t rest until she finds the right book.”
“Okay, see you tomorrow.” Mia and I quickly gathered our things and, after saying goodbye, headed to the living room. I had one unfinished business left for today.
We made the journey to Gryffindor Tower quickly and without incident, meeting only a couple of older, badger-like students. The common room was relatively quiet, save for a screaming crowd of third-years playing Gobstones and five older students running wildly between the sofas, cackling and throwing dirty underwear at each other. Mia and I exchanged glances and smiled, our familiar madhouse unchanged, and then headed off to visit. I hadn’t forgotten what my brother had said about our biological mother.
Climbing the spiral staircase, I entered the second-year boys’ dormitory without knocking. I liked this discrimination: boys were barred from the girls’ half, while girls could freely visit the domain of the stronger sex. At our appearance, the New Marauders jumped out of their beds and warily pointed their wands at us. Ron and Justin merely chuckled, but also rose from their beds and pulled out their Concentrators.
“Gentlemen, may I speak with Mr. Potter?” I smiled, causing Thomas and Finnigan to swallow nervously, and held up my empty palms. “Alone.”
– No problem! Let’s go, Jas. – Ron pulled his friend towards the exit, and as he passed, he whispered, – Are you sure? – I simply nodded in response.
My brother’s minions exchanged nervous glances and quickly left the room. Longbottom proved the most loyal, leaving only after a confident nod from his friend. True, that idiot tried to bump Mia with his shoulder as he passed, earning a strong punch to the gut, followed by a solid kick in the ass to speed things up.
“I’ll wait in the hallway.” My friend pulled a pair of brass knuckles out of her pocket. “While I’m at it, I’ll explain some manners to that rude guy.”
Mia left the room with a predatory grin, and I reached into my pocket for the pyramid; I didn’t want anyone to overhear us. Harry watched silently, keeping his wand trained on me as I activated the artifact and sat down on Justin’s bed.
“Have you come to look at our room?” Potter realized that I wasn’t going to attack and lowered the concentrator. “What do you want?”
“I want to talk about your behavior.” I looked up from studying the Quidditch team posters and into those familiar green eyes, but I saw nothing but fear and contempt in them. “Harry, what you said about Lily, do you really think that?”
This morning I wanted to strangle that brat, by lunchtime I just wanted to cripple him, and now I’ve calmed down a bit, and I’m curious about the reasons for such anger. How can you hate your own mother?! She gave birth to us and died protecting us, and he says such things about her.
“I don’t think so – I know, my godfather told me a lot of interesting things about that red-haired whore.” My brother hissed angrily and sat down on the bed. “It’s because of her that my father died, and we became orphans.”
– If you call Lily that again…
“My mother—that’s what I call her!” Potter interrupted me. “You have a new mother now, so stick up for her, and forget about Lily!”
“I remember that night very well and what that woman did for us, I will never forget.” My fists involuntarily clenched. “She sacrificed herself for us, and you…”
“That’s a lie!” Potter jumped out of bed. “That whore screwed half of Hogwarts, and then used a Dark ritual to seduce my father! Did you know that the Prince was courting that Mudblood, but she chose the poor wretch over the rich Potter?! The tramp tried to help, but it was like my father had been replaced; he even had a falling out with his parents!”
– What nonsense… You, like a stupid loser, believed this nonsense… – I shook my head sadly and looked into his green eyes. – Your godfather is brazenly lying, before entering Hogwarts, I read the dossier on their company, and it contained completely different information…
“I don’t care! It’s because of that red-haired whore that we’re in this situation.” Potter lowered his head and began to examine his wand.
– In which one?
“Deeply screwed.” Harry looked me in the eye. “The Blacks see me only as a valuable asset and the key to the Potters’ safe; they’ve already found me a wife and a future wizard. You know, I hate Dora and I can’t stand artifice! But Orion and Walburga don’t care, they’ve already decided everything for me! Padfoot tried to stand up for me, but they quickly shut him up. And then there’s this stupid fame; I can’t stand all these sycophants and toadies; sometimes I think the Dark Lord was right.”
“What’s wrong with marrying a beautiful and strong girl?” I looked at my brother, confused. “What about education? Potters have a knack for artifact making; we could whip up a simple amulet right on our laps. It seems to me you’re just a spoiled idiot, living life to excess.”
“You grew up in the house of a Muggle aristocrat, so don’t you dare blame me! Or do you like your position, wagging your tail in front of the Muggle elite and knowing that your future is already planned? I want to be in charge of my own life!” Potter got out of bed and took a step towards me. “If it weren’t for that red-haired whore, my father would have married a normal pureblood witch, and I would have had a full-fledged, loving family.”
“Actually, it was Potter and Black who did something to that poor girl, ruining her life and condemning her to death!” I glared at my brother. “On that fateful night, the Dark Lord came for us and offered Lily her life, but she defended us to the last. So don’t you dare call her a whore!”
“You think I’ll trust a traitor?!” My brother clenched his fists angrily and loomed over me. “You could have returned to your family, but instead you chose to be a dog on a Muggle leash! And now you’re trying to accuse my godfather of lying?! Padfoot and Neville were right, you’re a blood traitor!”
Khlobys!
I gave my brother a resounding slap and stood up. “Call me that again and I’ll hurt you! My real family is the Hellsings, and I’ve never betrayed anyone!” Sparks started appearing in my hair, and Potter backed away cautiously. “Your beloved Sirius left me, and because of him, I’ve been through a ton of crap! I never considered that bastard my family! And you’re nothing but a spoiled whiner accustomed to being allowed to do whatever he wants! Stop feeling sorry for yourself and blaming poor Lily for everything; it’s not her fault our dad turned out to be an idiot!”
– You hit me… Again… – Potter’s eyes glowed slightly, and he pointed his wand at me. – Muggle cur! Transmogrificial!
Like Neo from The Matrix, I dodged the dark blue beam and lunged forward. Harry blinked in surprise when my satisfied face appeared right in front of him. I grabbed his hand with the concentrator, and then his little green eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets as my knee hit something soft. Harry sang in a falsetto and, clutching his penis, fell to his knees. It seemed like that wasn’t enough, so I hit him on the head, and how the brass knuckles ended up on my hand, I don’t remember. The blow was strong, even his glasses flew off, but the little jerk couldn’t have a concussion because he didn’t have one.
“You know, I really just wanted to talk.” I knelt down in front of my groaning relative. “Remember, brother, if you insult Lily, my family, or my friends again, you’ll be in excruciating pain. I know how, I was taught.”
“You’ll get what’s coming to you, little sister, now walk around and look around.” Potter spat angrily on the floor and broke into a sly smile. “And don’t forget about your faithful girlfriends… You turn away, and they’re already on their knees, as filthy as they should be… Cough!”
My boot landed on the bastard’s throat, and he wheezed. Potter’s face started to turn blue from lack of oxygen, and I pulled my foot away. If he weren’t my brother, he’d be dead already. I wanted to press a little harder and break his Adam’s apple, but I pulled myself together. Not now, not at school. Wizards don’t like the Order anyway, and if I kill a national hero and the vanquisher of the Dark Lord, I could forget about normal relations for years.
“If anything happens to my friends, I’ll kill you, and believe me, your death will be long and painful.” I spoke when my brother’s gaze became meaningful. “I hope we understand each other.” Patting the boy’s cheek, who was writhing in pain, I picked up the pyramid from the bed and left the room.
– How was your conversation? – A satisfied Hermione was waiting for me in the corridor, and behind her, Longbottom was lying in a pool of his own vomit.
– About the same as you. – I smirked in response. – Potter doesn’t understand words at all, maybe he’s a masochist?
“His friend isn’t exactly bright either.” Mia spread her arms dramatically and laughed. “I’ve got an idea for Christmas presents!”
– Let’s go, you can tell me in the bedroom. – Holding hands, we went down to the living room.
– Are they badly broken? – Ron and Justin met us downstairs. – Should we send these, – a nod towards Thomas and Finigan, – to the hospital wing?
“They’re fine.” I waved my hand. “They’ll be fine in half an hour. Guys,” my voice became serious. “Be careful, Potter has declared war on me.”
– Is this the first time? – Ron chuckled cheerfully. – We’ve been fighting with the four-eyes and his minions for two years now, haven’t we, Jas?
– He threatened the girls. – I explained one unpleasant moment.
– Now this is serious, Ron, should we add more? – Justin clenched his fists and turned to his friend.
“I’m going to give that bully a beating now, he’s gotten completely insolent!” Weasley nodded and looked at us. “Good night!”
The boys quickly ran off to their rooms. Mia and I watched them go with a thoughtful look, then headed to the girls’ dorm. On the way, I told my friend about my conversation with my brother, and she promised to break something. Well, she had every right to. In the dorm, we were met by Elvira, who, along with Brown and Patil, was having a lively and cheerful discussion about Monopoly. It turns out Justin had managed to get our chatterboxes to join in, too. Wizards don’t have many other entertainment options, so the board game was a huge hit.
After chatting with my friends for a bit, we went to the shower, and half an hour later I was lying in a soft, cozy bed. The long day was finally over, and I was exhausted both mentally and physically. My thoughts were starting to wander, and I was about to fall asleep, but Vasya caught my attention by brazenly butting me in the cheek.
” Mistress, be careful with your fellow. ” The snake’s voice was worried. ” This brat is much stronger than you, but his Strength is weak.”
– What do you mean? – I looked sleepily at my familiar. – Can you tell me more?
” Power, he has more of it, I can feel it, ” the Serpent began to explain. ” You have a clear mountain stream flowing within you, while that scumbag has a slow, stinking river gurgling within. His Power is dirty and disgusting, like the marks of flea-bitten animals, but it’s much greater.”
– Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind. – I stroked Vasya’s muzzle. – Do you know why his power is dirty?
– I don’t give a damn, but here, – the snake butted me in the forehead, – it’s a real cesspool, it smells of rot and decay.
– Interesting… – I was already reaching for the Miracle Phone, but decided to first think about this news with a fresh head, and only then call my mother and grandfather.
“Master, should I bite him? ” The familiar paused. ” I understand you hatched from the same egg, but why the f*ck are you related like that?! I don’t like him, that two-legged piece of crap is a real bastard.”
– Not today and not at school. – I yawned involuntarily, and my eyes began to close. – Vasya, good night.
The disgruntled snake disappeared under the blanket and soon settled into its accustomed position at my feet, and I finally began to drift off into the world of Morpheus. I need to get some sleep; there’s still so much to do, how can I possibly get it all done? And then there’s my brother with his grievances… It looks like this year will be much more “fun” than the last. You can’t just kill the little bastard, but if he crosses the line, my hand won’t tremble.
